It Bears Repeating

In high school…in the 80′s I dreamt of becoming a writer.  I wrote short stories, and poems of teenage angst.  One of my stories was actually published in my high school newspaper, The Utopian.  In light of recent tragic events, I believe God led me to find this article after being buried amongst decades of memories.  Therefore, I believe He is leading me to share this once again…lest we forget.

Reflections… by Mindy Alexander (circa, 1983)

My Grandfather told me stories. What it was like. For him. For the six million others.  The labor camps. Being forced to pile up the dead bodies. If you were too old to work you simply disappeared. Perhaps into the gas chambers or into a bleak hole in the ground. It was all coming back now like flashing pictures of the past from the wooden encassed television which sat on its cold metal stand.

I stared in disbelief as the machine was given life.  A man with small, squinty eyes and a square, black moustache glared at me. Me! He was looking at me.  Not just at me, through me. I met his eyes with a cold, hard stare.  A thick German accent spilled forth from his lips, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up on end. Fuzzy round spots danced in front of my eyes.  I felt as if my world had turned upside down. dizziness and confusion took over as I watched pictures of my people being shot down where they stood.  Limbs being blown off bodies. Blood an dpieces of flesh scattered upon the dusty earth. Slaughter. Holocaust. The Final Solution. Hitler’s SS men, the “superior” race, lining up thousands of innocent people as you would cattle at an auction.  I cringed with each shot fired.

Screams. Silent screams. With their eyes. Their silent, unrelenting cries echo in my soul. I could not bear to watch, yet I could not turn away. Their cries, “No please, I don’t want to die,” fading off into the horror of the early morning.

Men, hands tied behind their frail bodies. Forced down on their knees. Tow young men. Their whole lives in front of them. Two shots rang out echoing in my mind. As their bodies slumped forward I cringed thanking God for not letting me be born forty-five years ago. Tears streamed my face.

Pain. Anguish. Horror. Helplessness. All emotions they could feel. Were felt by me. Me. A child of the 80′s How could I feel it? No answer.  There was no logical reasoning I could find, except, that maybe, through my Grandfather’s stories they had become real. All too real. I wanted to forget. Needed to forget. But I couldn’t. Not when it was being played out like some sick, horrifyingly real movie. But it was real. And I was a witness. To it. To the horror.

People. Innocent people being carelessly thrown and locked up in the cold, damp cattle cars. Hands reaching out from behind the bars, groping, trying to scratch and claw their way out.  The “Angel of Death” silently patrols the dry desolate grounds surrounding these horrifying cells.  He slowly turns and signals to his men.  The train starts to, slowly, embark on its death ride. Women cry, men quietly pray, children, bewildered smile at their parents looking for a small glint of hope.  Desperate, these people cling to the last few hours of life God has given them. I sit motionless in my chair. My hands sweat profusly. They grip at one another tyring to ease the pain and anger inside me. A scream reaches the top of my throat.  My eyes widen in terror as I see my ancestors’ destination.

AUCHSWITZ!!

The cold, grey buildings loomed up in front of them like giant tombstones,. I could smell the damp, musky stench that came from these stony graves. “No,” I cry. But I knew it was too late. About forty-five years too late. As they were being unloaded from the train their eyes widened in horror.  One man struggline with the SS. One shot fired. A thud as his body hit the ground. Silence. Screams from a woman and child. His wife. His child. Ugly, grotesque men, in Nazi garb, shove these people in straight lines. Hittler-like voices tell them they are to take showers to get cleaned up. “No, don’t go in there!” I scream. They slowly walk into the square stalls. Oh, if I could only go back and change the past. It’s gas. No!! Screams. I can watch no more. I get up from y seat and run from the room.  My teacher is not far behind.

“Hey, you o.k.?” He asks, gently grabbing my arm.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” My voice shakes and quivers in my throat. My heart beats wildly. Tears stain my face. Black splotches of mascara cake my eyes.

“Listen, the video is almost over. Why don’ you go to the bathroom and get cleaned up.”

“Thanks.” I breath a heavy sigh of relief as I walk silently to the girls’ bathroom. I splash handfuls of cold water on my face. My nerves ease a little as I let the cool liquid tricle down my face.

I catch my reflection in the mirror. I walk closer to the glass, dabbing at my face with a paper towel. Words in the mirror quickly catch my eye.  Oh God!! I turn slowly to read them off the wall. KILL THE PIGS!!!

“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.” ~ John 15:12

True Healing

Years ago I remember standing in my fuzzy teddy bear robe, my Michigan, wool-lined slippers and a hot cup of coffee in my hands waving goodbye to my precious children as the morning carpool drives slowly off into the early morning sunrise.  I close the door.

Ahhhhh! A few rare moments alone before the daily hustle and bustle kick in.  I put my feet up and start flipping through the channels on our television trying to find out what’s been happening in the world while I was asleep.

Well, before I even made it to CNN my remote skidded to a halt on an HBO special about the so-called faith healers.   The cathedral was breathtaking; the attendees jumping, clapping, weeping and dancing in the aisles; the choir regally dressed in purple and gold; the orchestra vehemently bringing the music to a heart-pounding crescendo.  Then he makes his entrance, dressed in white, silver hair gleaming under the stage lights, the conductor of this great performance.  Leaping, jumping around on stage, yelling to be heard over the throng of the thousands of witnesses to this symphony.  He asks “do you want to be healed?!?”  “Yes!!!!” cry thousands of people looking for the external healing that this man claims he can bring.  He cries, “I feel a presence in this room tonight, a healing presence!”  Hundreds are hand-picked by the conductor’s apprentices and they make their way to the stage.  In wheelchairs, on crutches, limping, some even on stretchers they come, believing in this man.  The conductor says “rise” and they rise.  “Walk” and they walk.

Sounds good doesn’t it?  Too good to be true.  Well….it is!  I suppose I should tell you that while this man was leaping around on stage “healing” people, a scientist was talking in the background.  He was saying how he has been able to recreate all of this in the laboratory.  He was able to take people and put them in a sensory deprivation chamber, hook up electrodes to certain areas of the brain and recreate that feeling of euphoria, that sense of a “presence” in the room, even that feeling of healing.   The music rising and falling at certain intervals: the colors of the choir robes: the size of the cathedral: and thousands of people suffering from emotional struggles, physical pain, mood disorders, and the belief that they will be healed: all of this can cause certain chemicals to be released into the brain thus giving those in the wheelchairs, and on the crutches that momentary ability to get up and walk (i.e. the placebo effect).  Notice the word “momentary.”  The people who were “healed” at this man’s performances did not achieve any lasting effect.  In fact, most of them were back in the wheelchairs and on the crutches in only hours after this event.

People continually look for the external “feel goods” and external sources to make their lives better, to find happiness, security, healing or inner peace.  We look to crystals, aromatherapy, new age, cults, psychics, and astrology to find peace and tranquillity.  All of it is pure nonsense and it is only temporary.

God, Our Father is the author of permanent inner peace, of permanent healing, how to make our lives better.   He is our only hope of finding true happiness and security.  Peace can be yours for the asking.  Why look for something that only lasts a moment, that only feels good temporarily, when Jesus longs to give you the ultimate peace, and tranquillity that will last eternally? He loves you just as you are and He died for you just as you are: flaws and all.  Come to Him.  Surrender yourself to the One who died for you on Calvary.  He’s waiting with open arms.

Discount Divorce

Discount Divorce – Fast and Easy…When “til’ death us do part” takes too long

I couldn’t believe my eyes.  That’s exactly the wording on a billboard I read recently.  I had to read it four or five times to make sure I was seeing it correctly.  In essence this advertisement recommends that when it takes too long for your spouse to die, it’s time to get a divorce.  I don’t think this is what God had in mind when He created marriage.

In Genesis 2:18, 20-24 we see God’s intent for marriage.  The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone, I will make a helper suitable for him.”  So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh.  Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.  The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman’ for she was taken out of man.”  For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.   God gave marriage as a gift to Adam and Eve.  They were created perfect for each other.  Marriage is designed by God and has three basic concepts: 1) the man leaves his parents and in a public act (the wedding ceremony) promises himself to his wife; 2) the man and woman are joined together and in doing so promise to take responsibility for each other’s welfare and also promise to love the mate above all others and; 3) the two become one flesh in the intimacy and commitment of sexual union that is reserved for marriage.

How about looking at Matthew 19:6 “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”    God intended marriage to be permanent.  Let’s think about the first marriage.  Adam and Eve.  Everything was perfect when they started out.  They had Paradise as their home, had all their needs met and God dwelt among them.  I imagine they talked about everything to each other, shared activities, ate meals together, prayed together.  They had it all.  Until one day things got bad.  Because of human nature both the man and woman sinned.  God punished them each in their own way and cast them out of the Garden.  Now, they had messed up pretty bad.   Adam could’ve blamed Eve for being tempted by the serpent and starting this whole mess.  Eve could’ve come up with some excuse like because Adam wasn’t spending enough time with her and the serpent paid attention to her that was what caused this disaster.   They COULD’VE said those things….but they didn’t.  They could’ve called it quits and left each other to take care of themselves on their own but they didn’t.  They stuck together through good times and bad and God was the center of their union.  It is only when God is the center that everything else falls into place.  God comes first then your spouse.  If you put God first in your life and in your marriage everything goes a little smoother.  Not to say we will have it easy because we won’t.

God tells us in His Word that we will have trials but those trials are made for us to depend on the One who can carry us through them.  Depend on the Lord who created you and your spouse.  He created you for his pleasure and his purpose.  He created a helpmate to stand beside you.  Don’t run away when things get rough, instead run into the arms of your Father who loves you and will help you work through whatever it is you are facing.

Focusing on the Smaller Picture

The longer I am a Christian and the longer I allow God to take control, the more I am convinced that He has an amazing sense of humor.  I believe He thoroughly enjoys talking to us when we least expect it. I remember not too long ago actually getting up the energy to get down on my hands and knees to scrub my floor.  So you can get a complete picture, I’m on my hands and knees with a scrub brush, I’m wearing kneepads and I’m singing several choruses of the Cinderella song.  You know the one, “Cinderelly, Cinderelly all I hear is Cinderelly.”  Anyway, so with sweat trickling from my brow and my fingers all pruny-looking from the water, this is when God chooses to speak to me.  I’m thinking about entire floor I have to scrub and I’m not very happy.  Well, God says to me: “look at the small square of tile in front of you, don’t think about the entire floor.”

That’s when it hits me.  WHAM, right upside the head:

Matthew 6:34 says “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

As Christians we have assurance from the One and Only God that He has a plan for us.  There is a reason He put us here on His earth and why He keeps us here.  However, even firm assurance from God the Almighty, doesn’t keep us from questioning, seeking and desiring the foreknowledge that He has.  We want to see what lies ahead.  But you know what, I don’t know if I’d want to see what lies ahead of me before it’s time.  What lies ahead might be the deepest, darkest, longest, most treacherous trial of my entire life.  Now, if I saw that in my future would I still eagerly walk down the path, that God has chosen for me, if I knew that it was going to lead me there?  God tells us in His Word that we will have trials, we will have pain.  As Christians we will be persecuted for our faith.  Some Christians today are being persecuted, tortured, and even martyred for their faith.  However, we have assurance from God that He knows what lies ahead, He has been there, and will be there with us.

Deuteronomy 31:8 “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you;’ he will never leave you nor forsake you.  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” 

What a statement of unconditional love from the Father! No matter what happens in this life, we have His promise that He has seen what lies ahead and He will be there with us.  We need to stop relying on ourselves and surrender to Him.

Don’t obsess about the past (He has seen you through it); stop worrying about tomorrow (He is already there); surrender today to Him (He is here with you now). 

Attitude Control

Has God ever given you a holy nudge? Several years ago, I went in for my yearly Mammogram and the doctor found something.  I did not receive a phone call regarding the finding, just a letter stating they’d found something irregular and needed to check previous films.  For two long days I waited, prayed, waited and prayed some more and so did a lot of my friends and family  As always, God hears and answers the sincere prayers of His children.  The result?  I’m fine.   Nothing physically wrong and no further investigation was needed.  Wrong!  There was a lot of further investigation needed, by me.  God tells us He is to come first in our lives.  God must be in the driver’s seat of our lives, if we are to experience the full, abundant life that is promised us.  My priorities were not in order.  I  had put things before God.  That’s why I called this time in my life my “wake up nudge.”  God gave me a little nudge and told me to get things in the right order.  I’m still working on it and with God’s help, I can do anything.  How are you doing with your priority list?  What is first in your life?  Is it money, possessions, work, status?  Do you put things above God?  Let me encourage you to get your priorities straight.

Matthew 6:33 says “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”   1 Kings 22:5 and 2 Chronicles 18:4 both state this;  “first seek the counsel of the Lord.” God is obviously telling us, His children, to look to him first in ALL things.  Not just when things are going bad or we need help getting through a tough day.  We must look to Him first, for everything, not just when our lives are rough but also when things are going good.

What stops us from putting God first?  Hmmmmm…. Wait.  Let me guess. Our own stubborn need to be in control?  Could that be it?  I know for me that bell rings more true than I would like.  As fallible, imperfect human beings we have a desire to be in control of everything.  You know what I’ve found out?  God does a lot better at controlling my life than I do.

I’d like to close with a story I heard from a very wise pastor.  He told about fighter pilots and how their planes would sometimes go into a stall, totally and completely out of control.  As the jet would accelerate toward the spinning earth below, the pilot would try, in vain, to correct the plane’s attitude on their own. The plane was equipped with a special device that if the pilot ever got into a stall situation, all he would have to do is let go of the control stick and the plane would attempt to correct itself.  The plane’s computer would pull it out of trouble if only the pilot would submit control.  It’s the same with God.  He longs to take over in our lives if we would only submit them to him.  I encourage you to submit the “stick” of your life to God and let Him control your “attitude”.  Believe me, He does a much better job on our lives than we ever could.

Reconditioning the Conditioned

I realized something on a recent road trip to visit my daughter.  My body is conditioned to fall asleep on long drives.  This started when I was very young and suffered from severe motion sickness.  My parents would tell me “just close your eyes, this will help you.”  They were right.  I closed my eyes and this prevented me from becoming violently ill.  It also saved my parents from large cleaning bills and heart ache. In my present day, if I’m the passenger, it only takes me approximately 40 minutes to an hour to start dozing off.  It’s not that I’m feeling ill, but rather my body has become accustomed to falling asleep.  I have to fight myself to stay awake and, nine times out of ten, I lose and doze off. This has become my norm.  Well, recently, I’ve attempted to condition my body, mind, spirit in other ways.  I have begun to walk 3 to 3.5 miles a day.  Physical exercise has NEVER been at the top of my to-do list.  I always looked at it as a chore.  I have recently had a change of perspective.  God has gifted me with the gift of mercy and I utilize this gift in the area of substance abuse counseling.  This is a very emotionally volatile field and often I am stressed or feeling anxious as I leave work for the day, thinking about my clients, the traumas they have suffered or are perpetuating, etc.  So one day I decided to go for a walk to work of the stress and anxiety.  I plugged in my ear buds, turned on one of my bible teaching apps and off I went.  I was surprised an hour later that not only had I walked 3 miles, I was able to get fed spiritually and my stress and anxiety was gone.  I have been doing this almost every day for the last two weeks.  I feel it if I don’t walk now.  I have reconditioned my body to enjoy and expect this.  Now I look forward to that time.  It’s my “me time.”   Since my work requires me to be in my office, ready to see clients at 4:30a.m. I often do not wake up until the very last minute, trying to squeeze in as much R.E.M. as I can.  This has caused me to rush about and often results in me feeling chaotic as I start my day. I have heard many pastors, preachers, bible study teachers and Christian friends say we should read our bibles first thing in the morning.  I have listened with envy to friends telling me they spend an hour with God every morning, praying and reading His word.  I’d have to get up at 1:30a.m. to do that.  It is true that God wants our “first fruits.”  This has always been a struggle for me as I am a sinner and selfish, I love my sleep.  I told myself, “I’ll just read my bible at night before I go to bed, that way I’m falling asleep with God’s Word on my heart.”  There is NOTHING wrong with this, however, for me, my mind turns off around 6:00p.m. and I’m falling asleep while reading scripture and the next day I remember nothing of what I’ve read.  That is not good.  I have this great App on my phone.  The You Version Bible App.  It’s fantastic, I can take sermon notes during church, read my bible, highlight passages that I want to memorize etc.  I have started reading through the Bible in a year utilizing this App.  I do this first thing in the morning.  Yup!  I set my alarm a little earlier (20 minutes), and this is the first thing I do.  I would normally reach for my phone first thing in the morning, check any text messages, Facebook posts, missed calls, etc.  Well, why not use that time to spend with God.  I have been putting Him last for far too long.  Once I made the decision to put God first, my mornings have become less chaotic and He has given me a strong desire to spend time with Him, pray and read from His word.  God is a God of relationships.  How can you build a relationship with someone if you’re not spending time with them?  Now is the time to change.  Put God first in your life and just see what He does.  Let’s give God our first fruits, not what’s left over. Let’s get our priorities straight. If God is first in your life, everything else will fall into place.

“Come Closer”

Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.~Matthew 11:28

When my son was very young I was meeting some of my friends at the gym so we could start working out.  I noticed one of my friends still in her car on the phone so I decided I would stay in my car until she was done. It was cold and I had forgotten my sweater.  As my 4-year-old son and I were waiting, I said to him “Hey buddy, can you put your jacket on?” He said “sure” and started to put on his coat.  Pretty soon I heard “ I need a little help here.”  From where I was sitting and where he was standing, I couldn’t reach him.  I kept asking him to come closer to me, but he was being defiant and refused to budge.  Eventually, he started jumping around in frustration.  In my best “Mommy” voice I told him “if you come over here, I can help you.”  That got his attention.  He walked over to me, smiled, and we worked together and got his coat on. God desires the same thing from us.  He wants to help us but we have to come to Him first.  Jesus states this in John Chapter 5 Verse 24 when He says “I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; he has crossed over from death to life.” (NIV)  Read that a couple of times.  Jesus is promising us eternal life.  We won’t be condemned.  We won’t suffer the Judgment.  We will live forever with Him.  But there is a condition to that promise.  We must BELIEVE.  Got that?  We must believe.  For some, perhaps even you, that is the hard part.  Believing in something we can’t touch or visibly witness with our own eyes.  What do you believe?  Do you believe that Jesus is God’s one and only Son?  Or do you believe that Jesus was a nice man, a prophet, a teacher but not the Son of God?  If you are not sure what you believe, I encourage you to do some soul searching.  Now is the time.  We are living in the last days.  Jesus is coming back soon.  I know where I’m going, do you know where you’re going?  Jesus states in John 14:6 “I am the way and the truth and the life.  No one comes to the Father except through me.”  No one gets to Heaven (The Father) without belief in Jesus Christ.  Do you want to be sure of eternal life, praising and worshiping our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ?  If you do, then pray this simple prayer: Dear Heavenly Father, I come to you now, just as I am, flaws and all.  Father forgive me for my sins, I lay them at your feet.  I believe in your Son Jesus Christ.  I believe you sent Him to die on the Cross for me.  I give my life to you right here, right now.  Send your Holy Spirit to live in me.  Thank you Father.  In Jesus Name, Amen. If you prayed this prayer, I encourage you to call someone, a Pastor, a Deacon, a Christian friend.  Someone you can talk to about this destiny-changing decision you just made.  Thank you for allowing me to share my heart with you.